edge of insanity

Its hotter than usual here in manila and all over the philippines. The more its getting hot, the more i might be losing it.

There is nothing to do, well u can go to the beach with friends over and over the weekend, but no matter how many times u try to drown yourself with sea water, it wouldn't clog your brains out and make you forget that there is an issue in this life of mine. Sometimes, things can be so routine and life can be so boring, u have the same dull day always. Except for the moments u have, but then its always back to reality afterwards, like there's this momentary happiness. I don't know why I'm sulking when I just had a relaxing weekend with my favorite people. At the next minute, you are waking up then at the next minute, you are struggling to sleep again. People then say, get out more..I've been out. I've been always out like a million times, the funny thing is the more I stay out the more I crave to stay inside and be away from everyone.

I must be losing it. But then again, how can I be more neurotic when I am already are.