It was the birthday of two of my closest friends yesterday but i felt depressed. probably due to my absence in attending my gym sched, but i felt alone for the first time. I felt crying because its like life has stopped for me, and there's no room for change or growth like im trapped in this. Then i thought about the other people who were single like me, maybe they also thought about this. Its just that sometimes, lifes fucking hard, and u get used to being single that every body can ask u for something or tell their life or problems to you, but in the end, you always have no one to tell your own stories too. its like life left u hanging at one point and ur sanity hangs by the edge.
There's this italian guy who emails me, for almost a month now, he's articulate and he's nice. primarily because he's a lawyer. we talk about lots of things, that even i dont know where to start. He likes to cook and we share the same taste in music. There even was a time when we both sent the same song from the same artist, which was quite weird coz the artist was not common (Zero 7). He talks about his day and his weekend, and i talk about mine, my friends and manila. Sometimes, my emails are just too long and probably irritating for him, but at least it keeps you waiting. My friends told me that this may be a good thing but im not sure, because, we arent really in that kind of thing .. or so to speak..besides, we're just friends and i think there's more to this guy than what he tells about in the email, and he has not told me why he' still single at the age of 30 or quite directly, we were just both assuming our lives. and we will see where this goes to or it might just end early on if he loses his patience with a nutcase like me.
I am off to work today and i hate it, im quite tired but may be i'll just try and cope with it.
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